Well my motivation just came in my email… My reapplication for summer camp next year.

Sometimes in my life, usually when I am feeling down or having a hard time getting myself back on track, something happens that I like to take as a sign. Usually it’s just something that gives me a feeling that I am doing good… that I am on the right path. For the last few months I have been feeling really down about myself. After I took the leave of absence from my job, I started shutting myself off from everyone. It has been hard to pull myself up from these feelings, and get myself back out there. Earlier this week I told myself what I need to do, and put my mind to it. Then I got my sign. Within the last two days I have heard this song in different places, about 5 times now. And as I sit here on the couch, looking up jobs… the song just came on my neighbor’s radio outside. The song is my sign. And I know that everything is going to be alright.

Weekly Weigh In Week 1 back on track!  I did pretty good.  Proud of myself.  Feelin’ good.  Thanks for all the support everyone!

She also put my picture from last year with my picture from this year to show the progress I made in my weight loss journey.  Look at my face in the 1st one!!! It’s weird because you never think you are that big, until you get smaller and look back.

She also put my picture from last year with my picture from this year to show the progress I made in my weight loss journey.  Look at my face in the 1st one!!! It’s weird because you never think you are that big, until you get smaller and look back.

Ah I am so damn bloated.  Period is on it’s way… of course.  I ate way too much over the weekend… and last night for our anniversary… and I had alcohol…. 

Tomorrow Gary and I are going to a wine and food tasting in Hillcrest…. I thought it would be fun for us to do.  Any yeah, and fun for me to pack on a few more pounds.  

As of this morning I was 232.  Gross.  So gross.

I.need.to.stop.eating.food.

This weekend I am going to visit my Mom and my friend Raquel, and we are going to tea and to see the Glee movie.  Tea + Glee.  So excited.  And yet… there’s more food.  Damn.

I think tomorrow since I know I will be eating bad at night, I will eat incredibly light during the day, and try to get a workout in after work.

My gym friend is so on her game.  She looks great.  And every time she sees me, I think she thinks I am a lost cause at this point.  She doesn’t care anymore.  LoL.  

The birthday bash is in… um… 4 weeks?  Can I get down to 220 in 4 weeks?!!? That was the original goal… way back when.  I really wanted 215… but as it stands at 232 this morning… that is not looking good.

It’s the (in)famous “Skinny Shirt”.  Check out “Progress Pictures” page for more of this shirt.

It’s the (in)famous “Skinny Shirt”. Check out “Progress Pictures” page for more of this shirt.

This morning I finally got back down to 223… It’s been up and down since Pride week… Time to kick it up and move forward. 185 here I come.

:-)

Here’s another FAT picture… ahhh look at my face.  How did I think that was cute?

Here’s another FAT picture… ahhh look at my face.  How did I think that was cute?

I’m cleaning out my computer to make room for future writing files… more on that later.  I am finding all of these old fat pictures of myself.  I have times where I feel like I havent made any progress…. then I see pictures like this and I know I have made a lot of progress and should be proud of myself.

This picture was from the day before our Wedding… August 15, 2008.  Little sad to me, Gary had lost about 50lbs and was the smallest he had ever been, and I was about 15lbs away from my highest.  

I’m cleaning out my computer to make room for future writing files… more on that later.  I am finding all of these old fat pictures of myself.  I have times where I feel like I havent made any progress…. then I see pictures like this and I know I have made a lot of progress and should be proud of myself.

This picture was from the day before our Wedding… August 15, 2008.  Little sad to me, Gary had lost about 50lbs and was the smallest he had ever been, and I was about 15lbs away from my highest.